Wednesday, September 10, 2008

A Light for Your Path

Today's Scripture

“Your Word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path” (Psalm 119:105).

Today's Word from Joel and Victoria

Do you need direction in any area of your life today? You might be making decisions about your job, home or relationships, but you don’t have to make those decisions on your own. God is interested in every detail of your life, and He’s provided direction and guidance in His Word. When life seems dark, or when you aren’t sure about which choice to make, turn on the light of God’s Word so you can see clearly what to do. As you meditate on His Word and confess His promises over your life, it chisels away the walls of doubt, fear and uncertainty that would try to block you or hold you back.

Remember, you can always trust God because He is good and He has plans to prosper and bless you when you follow His Word. The Bible tells us that the path of the righteous is like the light of dawn which shines brighter and brighter. That means His truth will guide and direct your heart in the direction of peace, blessing and increase in every area of your life!

A Prayer for Today

Father in heaven, I humbly come to You giving You all that I am. I invite You to direct my steps by the light of Your Word. Fill me with Your peace and confidence as You show me the good plan You have in store. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

[Non- Work]Hanging On and Never Letting Go

Some years ago, on a hot summer day in south Florida, a little boy decided to go for a swim in the old swimming hole behind his house. In a hurry to dive into the cool water, he ran out the back door, leaving behind shoes, socks, and shirt as he went.

He flew into the water, not realizing that as he swam toward the middle of the lake, an alligator was swimming toward the shore.

His father working in the yard saw the two as they got closer and closer together. In utter fear, he ran toward the water, yelling to his son as loudly as he could.

Hearing his voice, the little boy became alarmed and made a U-turn to swim to his father. It was too late. Just as he reached his father, the alligator reached him. From the dock, the father grabbed his little boy by the arms just as the alligator snatched his legs. That began an incredible tug-of-war between the two. The alligator was much stronger than the father, but the father was much too passionate to let go. A farmer happened to drive by, heard his screams, raced from his truck, took aim and shot the alligator.

Remarkably, after weeks and weeks in the hospital, the little boy survived. His legs were extremely scarred by the vicious attack of the animal. And, on his arms, were deep scratches where his father's fingernails dug into his flesh in his effort to hang on to the son he loved.

The newspaper reporter who interviewed the boy after the trauma, asked if he would show him his scars. The boy lifted his pant legs. And then, with obvious pride, he said to the reporter, 'But look at my arms. I have great scars on my arms, too. I have them because my Dad wouldn't let go.'

You and I can identify with that little boy. We have scars, too. No, not from an alligator, but the scars of a painful past. Some of those scars are unsightly and have caused us deep regret. But, some wounds, my friend, are because God has refused to let go. In the midst of your struggle, He's been there holding on to you.

The Scripture teaches that God loves you. You are a child of God, He wants to protect you and provide for you in every way. But sometimes we foolishly wade into dangerous situations, not knowing what lies ahead. The swimming hole of life is filled with peril - and we forget that the enemy is waiting to attack. That's when the tug-of-war begins - and if you have the scars of His love on your arms, be very, very grateful. He did not and will not ever let you go.

Never judge another person's scars, because you don't know how he got them. Right now, someone needs to know that God loves them, and you love them, too- enough to not let them go.

Bf upgrade

Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a slow down in the overall performance, particularly in the flower and jewellery applications that had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 un-installed many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, but installed undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0, NBA 3.0, FIFA 6.2 and RUGBY 3.0. And now Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and House Cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.

I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.What can I do?

Signed,

Desperate


Reply:

Dear Desperate:

First keep in mind; Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package, while husband 1.0 is an operating system. Try entering the command C:\ I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME and download Tears 6.2 to install Guilt 3.0.

If all works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 orBeer 6.1.

Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will create Snoring Loudly.wavfiles.

Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-Law 1.0 or reinstall anotherBoyfriend program. These are not supported applications and will crashHusband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have a limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider additional software to improve memory and performance. I personally recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 6.9.

Good Luck,

Tech support

THIS IS A GOOD REMINDER TO ALL OF US - HOW TO CONTROL EMOTIONS

This would give you guides on how to control your emotions towards your better-half, friends, officemates and all the people around you, especially your "boss". The rules of practicing "ugaling langit, ugaling kaaya-aya" :

#1 Ang naunang magalit ang may karapatang magalit. Pag naunahan ka na ng galit niya, tumahimik ka na lang muna.

#2 Walang taong nag-aaway mag-isa. Pag hindi kayo sumagot o pumatol, titigil din daw ang taong nakikipag- away sa inyo.

#3 Ang taong galit, 'bingi.' If someone is angry, wala raw pinakikinggan, so, don't try to explain and fight back. Hindi ka niya iintindihin dahil wala siyang naririnig kundi ang sarili nya.

#4 Ang taong galit, 'abnoy.' Ayon sa pastor, Biblical daw ito? because the Lord said when He was crucified, "Father, patawarin mo sila dahil hindi nila alam ang kanilang ginagawa." Modern term for these kinds of people are abnoys, so you better not get angry para huwag kang matawag na abnoy. You should also know and realize that the persons who make your day bad are jewel, because you need them for you to mature. Hangga't andyan daw sila at kinaiinisan mo, ibig sabihin, immature ka pa. God will not take away those people; it's for you to take away your bad feelings towards them. You'll know na mature ka na pag dumating 'yung time na hindi ka na naiinis sa mga taong ito because you have learned to accept them and to have patience with them.

#5 Finally, the best part of this is to tell yourself na, because of this person, "I will grow mature," and that DAHIL SA CONTRIBUTION NIYA SA MATURITY MO, KUKUNIN DIN SYA NI LORD.

Mentality Makeover

Today's Scripture

“…Love others as you love yourself” (Galatians 5:14).

Today's Word from Joel and Victoria

What you believe about yourself—your self-esteem, your sense of value, your sense of worth—sets the limits for your life. It sets the limits for your ability to love others the way God intends. The problem that many people have today is they don’t really even like themselves. They constantly focus on their faults and shortcomings and then wonder why they don’t enjoy life or have any enthusiasm or why their relationships aren’t working. Understand that you cannot be negative toward yourself and expect to live a positive, faith-filled life. In order to love yourself so that you can love others, you have to have a mentality makeover. If you’ll get your thinking corrected and start thinking like a champion, like a child of the Most High God, like you’ve been crowned with favor, you’ll be amazed at what will happen. When you change your mentality and allow thoughts of faith and victory to fill your heart and mind, that faith and victory will spill over onto the people around you. When you love yourself the way God loves you, that love will pour out on others as well. As you live and love the way God intends, you will find peace, joy, and victory in every area of your life!

A Prayer for Today

Heavenly Father, I open my heart to You today and ask that You help me see myself and others the way You do. Fill me with Your love and confidence so I can love others the way You intend. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

To all my friends who have sent me best 'wishes', chain letters, 'angel' letters or other promises of good luck,

NONE OF THAT SHIT WORKED!

Could you please just send

cash, rum, chocolate, wine, or airline tickets instead?

Thank you! J

New policy in heaven

It was getting a little crowded in Heaven, so God decided to change the admittance policy. The new law was that in order to get into Heaven, you had to have a really bad day on the day that you died. The policy would go into effect at noon the next day.

So, the next day at 12:01 the first person came to the gates of Heaven. The Angel at the gate, remembering the new policy, promptly asked the man, 'Before I let you in, I need you to tell me how your day was going when you died.'

'No problem, the man said. 'I came home to my 25th-floor apartment on my lunch hour and caught my wife having an affair. But her lover was nowhere in sight. I immediately began searching for him. My wife was half naked and yelling at me as I searched the entire apartment.

Just as I was about to give up, I happened to glance out onto the balcony and noticed that there was a man hanging off the edge by his fingertips! The nerve of th at guy!

Well, I ran out onto the balcony and stomped on his fingers until he fell to the ground.

But wouldn't you know it, he landed in some trees and bushes that broke his fall and he didn't die. This ticked me off even more. In a rage, I went back inside to get the first heavy thing I could get my hands on to throw at him.

Oddly enough, the first thing I thought of was the refrigerator. I unplugged it, pushed it out onto the balcony, and tipped it over the side. It plummeted 25 stories and crushed him!

The excitement of the moment was so great that I had a heart attack and died almost instantly.'

The Angel sat back and thought a moment. Technically, the guy did have a bad day. It was a crime of passion. So, the Angel announced, 'OK, sir. Welcome to the Kingdom of Heaven ,' and let him in.

A few seconds later the next guy came up. To the Angel's surprise, it was Donald Trump.

'Mr. Trump , before I can let you in, I need to hear about what your day was like when you died.'

Trump said, 'No problem. But you're not going to believe this. I was on the balcony of my 26th floor apartment doing my daily exercises. I had been under a lot of pressure so I was really pushing hard to relieve my stress. I guess I got a little carried away, slipped, and accidentally fell over the side!

Luckily, I was able to catch myself by the fingertips on the balcony below mine. But all of a sudden this crazy man comes running out of his apartment, starts cussing, and stomps on my fingers. Well, of course I fell. I hit some trees and bushes at the bottom, which broke my fall, so I didn't die right away.

As I'm laying there face up on the ground , unable to move and in excruciating pain, I see this guy push his refrigerator of all things off the balcony. It falls the 25 floors and lands on top of me, killing me instantly.'

The Angel is quietly laughing to himself as Trump finishes his story. 'I could get used to this new policy,' he thinks to himself. 'Very well,' the Angel announces. 'Welcome to the Kingdom of Heaven ,' and he lets Trump enter.

A few seconds later, Bill Clinton comes up to the gate. The Angel is almost too shocked to speak. Thoughts of assassination and war pour through the Angel's head. Finally he says, 'Mr. President, please tell me what it was like the day you died.' Clinton says,

'OK, picture this. I'm naked, inside a refrigerator......

Your ABC

AVoid negative sources, people, places, things & habbits.

Believe in youself

Consider things from every angle.

Don't give up and don't give in.

Enjoy life today, yesterday is gone, tomorrow may never come.

Family and friends are hidden treasures; enjoy their riches.

Give more than you planned to.

Hang on to your dreams.

Ignore those who try to discourage you.

Just do it.

Keep trying no matter how hard it seems, it will get easier.

Love yourself first and most.

Make it happen.

Never lie, cheat or steal, always strike a fair deal.

Open your eyes and see things as they really are.

Practice makes perfect.

Quitters never win and winners never quit.

Read, study and learn about everything important in your life.

Stop procrastinating.

Take control of your own destiny.

Understand yourself in order to better understand others.

Visualize it.

Want it more than anything.

Xcellerate your efforts.

You are unique of all God's creations, nothing can replace YOU.

Zero in on your target and go for it!

Dear Friends,

Dear Friends,

Just wanted to tell everyone that I am so grateful to have each of you in my life.I pray you all have a blessed day. It was difficult for me to decide who I thought would DO this because many people claim to pray, but not everyone does. I hope I chose the right twelve. Please send this back to me (You'll see why). May everyone who received this message be blessed. REMEMBER to Pray. That's all you have to do. There is nothing attached. Just send this to twelve. Prayer is one of the best free gifts we receive. There is no cost, just a lot of reward. Make sure you pray, and pray believing God will answer. May today be all you need it to be. May the peace of God and the freshness of the Holy Spirit rest in your thoughts, rule in your dreams tonight, and conquer all your fears. May God manifest himself today in ways you have never experienced. May your joys be fulfilled, your dreams be closer, and your prayers be answered. I pray that faith enters a new height for you; I pray that your territory is enlarged. I pray for peace, healing, good health, happiness, prosperity, joy, true and undying love for God. I pray that God will reveal himself to each of you this week. I know God put each of you in my life for a special reason and I am so blessed to know each of you.